Eat, Pray, Love

"I disappear into the person I love. I am the permeable membrane. If I love you, you can have everything. You can have my time, my devotion, my ass, my money, my family, my dog, my dog's money, my dog's time-everything. If I love you, I will carry for you all your pain, I will assume for you all your debts (in every definition of the word), I will protect you from your own insecurity, I will project upon you all sorts of good qualities that you have never actually cultivated in yourself and I will buy Christmas presents for your entire family. I will give you the sun and the rain, and if they are not available, I will give you a sun check and a rain check. I will give you all this and more, until I get so exhausted and depleted that the only way I can recover my energy is by becoming infatuated with someone else." -from Eat, Pray, Love

Isn't it Romantic?

So, I was SUPPOSED to have a weekend away at a romantic getaway with a certain someone. Instead, I got a weekend of wishing I was anywhere but here. I think it is definitely time to move on. I think I am discovering that I'm not the kind of person that sticks around. There's just never anything to keep my attention for any length of time. 

That is all for now. 

Everything Changes yet Everything Stays the Same

Just returned from a 2 week "break". I decided to try to see things thru fresh eyes. Funny, it all filters into the same images as before. Maybe next time I take a real vacation. One without computers, cell phones, appointments, schedules, etc. I need a "Calgon, take me away" kind of break. 

Kony 2012 and Why I Want to Stay in Haiti

In the beginning, my dream was to go to Africa. I mean, doesn't everybody at some point or another have a vision of themselves in the Motherland doing something, whether it be missions work, humanitarian aid, or even just a safari? My initial interest was sparked after seeing the animated film, Hugo the Hippo. It turned me on to Zimbabwe and the political strife of the region. Later, as I started seriously thinking of what type of work I would do in Africa, I realized I wanted to work with children. I looked into several options. For a few years now I've been looking into positions with assorted NGOs and charities in Zimbabwe such as the Zimbabwe Project, a Canadian orphan care organization. But as I do not have a Master's degree in the areas they require, I had been unable to catch a break. I guess true experience and expertise in a field doesn't mean squat when you have shareholders to answer to. 

Bastard!

One thing I've discovered in life is that when you meet a bastard that spends most of his time telling you what a good so-and-so he is, generally he is not. So, here I am, stuck in the middle of what I want to accomplish, and what I'm being prohibited from accomplishing, and my best bet right now is a circle-talking, scheming, conniving, under-handed, bastard who in one breath is telling you, "Yeah, I'm a bastard, but I'm telling you up front I'm a bastard so you can't hold it against me" and in the other is explaining that anyone that would be a bastard to you can't be trusted...Oy!

So, if you haven't figured it out, the word for today is: BASTARD! 

I better go do some yoga!

Frack!

In the words of Trisha Yearwood, Some days are better than others...I've gotten to have such a potty mouth since I've been here. I just get so frustrated with all of the things I want to do, but can't just do. Thank God for cheap wine and good company!

Things I won't miss when I leave

the lack of fresh produce

not being able to go grab a cappuccino

not being able to go grab anything - not having a car and all

empty gas pumps

dirty feet

the smell of burning garbage

roosters crowing 

dogs fighting/getting hit by cars and rocks