Movie Review - Long Overdue

I'm not sure what this next semester holds for me...but I'm going to try really hard to post more frequently.

So here's the first movie review of the year - stay tuned for more:

Love and Other Drugs

Maggie has Parkinson's and Jamie is a philandering ne'er-do-well. Somehow the two of them make it work. All thru the movie I kept waiting for the words, "you...complete me". So, at it's worst it was formulaic and predictable. At it's best, it was some steamy hot sexy love story. In the middle it was the story of a boy who never really thought much of himself meeting a girl that had written herself off. Together they made a pretty good pair.

My favorite scene -


Him: I never actually knew anyone, who believed I was enough, til I met you. And then you made me believe it too. So, uh, unfortunately, I need you. And you need me.
Her: no I don't
Him: yes you do
Her: no I don't
Him: yes, you do
Her: stop it! Stop saying that
Him: you need someone to take care of you
Her: no I don't
Him: Everybody does
Her: I'm going to need you, more than you'll need me
Him: that's okay
Her: no it's not! It isn't fair. I have places to go
Him: You'll go there. I just may have to carry you
Her: I can't ask you to do that
Him: you didn't

Even though I kept envisioning him and Heath on that mountaintop - I still give this one 4 out of 5 rages

Birthday Smirthday

So, Wednesday marks 41 times around the sun for me. Big whoop. I'm really not afraid of that number. I'm not angry about the stiffness in my joints every morning. I'm not resentful of the fact that I have to squint a little to read the Sunday crossword. I'm not even upset about the handful of white hairs that have suddenly popped up around my hairline. I'm not a vain person. I have always embraced the idea of growing older, always looked forward to proudly wearing my wrinkles earned through a full life. It's everything else attached to my birthday that makes me want to crawl in a cave and hide til next week.

My little sister was born in the middle of my 3rd birthday party and I've had very few pleasant birthday memories since. And now that she's gone I can't think of my birthday without thinking about her. And I can't think about her without thinking about all the crap attached to that.

Plus, thinking about my birthday makes me have to think about how yet another year has gone by and I'm further away from where I thought I'd be by now. I just wish my birthday would go away.

I'm really trying to get to the place where I can let all this go. I know I should be grateful for the blessings I have instead of being hung up on what I don't have. If you have any hints or tips on how to do that, let me know.

Nightmares at the gym

So, remember that nightmare you have were you are standing in front of a large crowd and you realize you are naked? Oh, you've never had that one? That must be my nightmare then. Yikes!

Today my dreams finally came true! Sort of. Well, not really, but here's what happened, you be the judge.

Usually after my work out, I like to spread out on a towel in the Arizona Dry Heat Room. I put a towel over my head to block out the light, pop on some meditative music on the iPod and float away into my Arizona dreams...I usually stay around 50 - 60 minutes...til the 140* heat causes my eyelids to stick to my dried out eyeballs!

Now, before you give me some lecture about that not being very healthy and how you're only supposed to stay for up to 20 minutes, let me explain that I gradually worked my way up to that amount of time...I am perfectly fine in there! I've monitored my blood pressure and everything is A-OK!

Afterwards, I like to stretch out on a chaise in the pool room, cover up with my blanket sized towel, replace the towel over my eyes and continue listening to my iPod til my temperature and pulse return to normal. I like to be completely cooled down before I get into the shower. Nothing worse than getting out of the shower and you're still sweaty! Eww Yuck!

Today, as I'm lying there listening to whales mating or rain forest bats eating bugs or some other new age fluff, the pool attendant comes in and loudly proclaims that everyone must exit the pool room. She then turns around without explanation and disappears back into the work out room. We all look at each other rather befuddled and bewildered. Nobody is sure what she means or why.

I get all my things together and walk into the locker room to find out what is going on. A few of the ladies tug their clothing on over wet bathing suits and head for the door. A few others just go back to their beauty routines and gossipping. I ask the lady using the locker next to mine what this is all about. She says she's not sure, but she heard they want us all dressed and out of there.

Well, I was soaked in sweat. There was no way I was going outside in that condition. I figured as long as it was going to take some of those old birds to get dressed, I could get in and out of the shower and still beat them out the door. So I grabbed my toilette and towels and headed back in. I was in the military for 12 years...I can shit, shower and shave faster than anyone I know! I was in and out in about two minutes and back at my locker before my old friend got her duffel bag out and opened.

So I grab my lotion and start slathering it on as fast as I can and just as I draw a stream of it across my arm and onto my chest, the entire Harper Woods Fire Department walks past my locker! Holy Toledo! The locker room attendant yells, "man on deck!" and gives me a dirty look as she saunters on by and says, "I told you to get dressed!"

Well, I can only imagine what my face must have looked like from the other side! I was utterly flabbergasted! The old gal next to me started laughing so hard her uppers slid out! Another old bird walked out of one of the dressing booths only half clad and said, "hell, I ain't got nuttin dem boys ain't seen afore!" Well, maybe she's right, but most of those boys were under 25 and I'm sure they hadn't seen it like she was showing it! lol

The old gal next to me dropped her towel to the floor and proceeded to get dressed as if it was just another day at the gym! I modestly opted to grab my garments and head for the nearest changing booth. They may have seen it before, but they weren't gonna be mortified by mine! hahaha

Turns out one of the guests thought she smelled Carbon Monoxide. Now before you say it, yes, we all know you can't smell Carbon Monoxide, but that's what she kept insisting on...Based on the high standard of sanitation of the staff, I'd say she probably smelled the years and layers of dust/hair/grime burning off the heat vent slats when the hot room fans turn on. It's no wonder they are closing down that location at the end of the month.

The Osmonds

OMG! How much did you love em?



reposted from http://listoftheday.blogspot.com/

Whoa! The Evolution of Life?

watch this:


MUTO a wall-painted animation by BLU from blu on Vimeo.

from:
http://soulpancake.com/

The Old Lady

So, my golden retriever will be 13 in another month (we think, she's a rescue so age is estimated, but we've always used Easter as her "birthday"). We've been very fortunate in that she has not yet lost continence, well, for the most part. I know that this is a common problem with retrievers around this time in their lives. What she DOES have, is a SHART problem.

**WARNING - this may get a little gross**

For those who don't know what a SHART is, it's when you think you're going to cut the cheese, and instead, you pop out a wee little nugget. Yeah, it's gross, but I warned you it would be!

So, anyway, she's getting to the point were she doesn't ask to go out anymore. She just wanders around the house and sighs alot. Then when you get the hint and ask her if she needs to go out, she jumps up and pops out a shart. Like she's been holding it for so long, the exertion causes the incident!

And what's even funnier is the embarrassment she displays subsequent to these "episodes". She looks downright ashamed! This always amuses me. There's this old saying that goes something like "Doggie farts, warms my heart". But that she actually feels bad about doing this really cracks me up.

This runs completely against how humans behave at that age. I mean, there's these old ladies at my gym that are constantly fouling up the air quality around the treadmills, and believe you me, the deep breathing one does while running on the treadmill can be dang near devastating when one of these grannies craps her pants! And what's worse, they actually get offended if you make faces or noises of disgust. One of them "tched" me the other day when I groaned and started waving my towel in an attempt to fan the air!

Boy,I hope I have as much dignity as my Sheila has when I get older. I sure love that old girl!

on being single

Oh, please shoot me before I ever need one of these!

Easy-to-use bathroom aid extends your reach.


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