Love and suffering

We are never so defenseless against suffering as when we love. - Freud

Well, we have survived another annual holiday of suffering. Yeah, I know, it's supposed to be a holiday of amore. But more and more, all I hear from the general public is grumblings of the stress of finding the perfect gift, planning the perfect night, or for those unfortunate (or fortunate) enough to be uncoupled, there's the let down of being alone, or if self imposed, the pressure from others to be in a couple. Everywhere you turn, there are reminders of passionate love. 

But this doesn't have to create suffering. Buddha says that pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. We create the reality we live in through the energy of our thoughts, words and actions (karma). If you want to be miserable, there's pretty much nothing that will can prevent that. But if you would like to be the captain of your own dreams, learn to harness the power of your thoughts, and create that for yourself. 

Through mindful practices, you can begin to change your brain patterns and rewrite not just your future, but also your past. Meditation comes in many forms, and for those that are intimidated by the idea of sitting quietly with nothing but their thoughts, there is a method for that. 

Join me at 11 am on Sunday at Little Lotus Wellness Studio in Ferndale for "Shift Happens" a donation based meditation group. We will play with a few proven meditation methods, some you may connect with, others you may just appreciate the experience of. There's something to love for everyone! 

Come meditate with us - click here for details

Sawabona Shikoba - the meaning

Here is the original post that was shared to me:

SAWABONA!!!

Há uma "tribo" africana que tem um costume muito bonito.
Quando alguém faz algo prejudicial e errado, eles levam a pessoa para o centro da aldeia, e toda a tribo vem e o rodeia. Durante dois dias, eles vão dizer ao homem todas as coisas boas que ele já fez.

A tribo acredita que cada ser humano vem ao mundo como um ser bom. Cada um de nós desejando segurança, amor, paz, felicidade. Mas às vezes, na busca dessas coisas, as pessoas cometem erros.
A comunidade enxerga aqueles erros como um grito de socorro.
Eles se unem então para erguê-lo, para reconectá-lo com sua verdadeira natureza, para lembrá-lo quem ele realmente é, até que ele se lembre totalmente da verdade da qual ele tinha se desconectado temporariamente: "Eu sou bom".

Sawabona Shikoba!
SAWABONA, é um cumprimento usado na África do Sul e quer dizer:
"Eu te respeito, eu te valorizo. Você é importante pra mim"

Em resposta as pessoas dizem SHIKOBA,que é:
"Então, eu existo pra você".

Foto: Jessica Hilltout/AMEN
Imagem de pessoas em Gana utilizada para ilustrar o post.

translation:

Sawabona!!!

There is a ' ' African Tribe that has a custom very beautiful.
When someone does something harmful and wrong, they take the person to the centre of the village, and the whole tribe comes and surrounds you. For two days, they will say to the man all the good things that he has already done.

The tribe believes that every human being comes to the world as a be good. Each of us wants security, love, peace, happiness. But sometimes, in search of these things, people make mistakes.
The community sees those mistakes like a cry for help.
I am good ".

Sawabona Shikoba!
Sawabona, it is a compliment used in South Africa and want to say:
I love you respect, I appreciate you. You are important to me '

People say in response shikoba, which is:
' then I exist to you ".

Photo: Jessica Hilltout / Amen
Image of people in Ghana used to illustrate the post.

Sawabona Shikoba

A good friend of mine shared a beautiful post on FB about the South African greeting, "Sawabona, Shikoba". In looking for more information on this version of Maitri, or Metta, I discovered this webpage and wanted to share. How enlightening:

Sawabona Shikoba

Isn't it Romantic?

So, I was SUPPOSED to have a weekend away at a romantic getaway with a certain someone. Instead, I got a weekend of wishing I was anywhere but here. I think it is definitely time to move on. I think I am discovering that I'm not the kind of person that sticks around. There's just never anything to keep my attention for any length of time. 

That is all for now. 

Movie Review - Long Overdue

I'm not sure what this next semester holds for me...but I'm going to try really hard to post more frequently.

So here's the first movie review of the year - stay tuned for more:

Love and Other Drugs

Maggie has Parkinson's and Jamie is a philandering ne'er-do-well. Somehow the two of them make it work. All thru the movie I kept waiting for the words, "you...complete me". So, at it's worst it was formulaic and predictable. At it's best, it was some steamy hot sexy love story. In the middle it was the story of a boy who never really thought much of himself meeting a girl that had written herself off. Together they made a pretty good pair.

My favorite scene -


Him: I never actually knew anyone, who believed I was enough, til I met you. And then you made me believe it too. So, uh, unfortunately, I need you. And you need me.
Her: no I don't
Him: yes you do
Her: no I don't
Him: yes, you do
Her: stop it! Stop saying that
Him: you need someone to take care of you
Her: no I don't
Him: Everybody does
Her: I'm going to need you, more than you'll need me
Him: that's okay
Her: no it's not! It isn't fair. I have places to go
Him: You'll go there. I just may have to carry you
Her: I can't ask you to do that
Him: you didn't

Even though I kept envisioning him and Heath on that mountaintop - I still give this one 4 out of 5 rages

Conversations with myself

Well, there are a few things I'd like to say to a few people that just wouldn't be prudent at this time. So, I'm going to say them to myself.

Here goes:


*You really piss me off when you walk around here like little miss oh I'm so special and you're sweet to everyone but me. Get over it. I hurt your feelings. I said I'm sorry. Pull up your big girl panties and get on with life.

*I really can't figure out where I went wrong. How did you spend all that time with me and still end up thinking and acting the way you do?

*I really miss you and I don't think you put me high enough on your priority list. I feel like I should be more important to you.

*I don't understand why you continue to shut me out. I am the closest living relative they have on earth besides you. It hurts me to the point of crippling me that you won't let me be a part of their lives.

*So I took advantage of you. I was wrong to do that. But just for a moment I wanted to pretend that you hadn't done the same thing to me all those years ago.

*acknowledge me, dammit!

*I no longer have the desire to have a relationship with you. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me...I won't be fooled a third time.

*if I was any lonelier, I'd be a big-haired 80s rock ballad.

My biological clock stopped ticking...

I saw this cute movie the other day called TiMer. The premise of the story is that people can go to this electonics company and have a timer implanted on their wrist. The timer will countdown the exact hours, minutes, and seconds until you can expect to meet your soul mate. Only the timer doesn't activate until your souldmate has a timer installed also.

The idea got me thinking, my luck is so awful when it comes to matters of the heart, I'm quite certain if I installed one it would immediately display negative 175,316hours 15 minutes and 18 seconds(20 years)

If you know any decent eligible bachelors, point them my way!