Karma

The more I learn about how the world operates, the more I realize I know nothing. But I also realize that God gives you plenty of opportunities to master the lessons you need the most. Karma. Learn the first time and be done with it. Don't quite learn it? Doomed to repeat it. But Doomed may not be the choicest word, for it is sometimes a real blessing to have the chance to keep learning. Few things are fatal. 

All this is a very cryptic way of saying, I think I'm getting the hang of realizing when I'm in the midst of a lesson, even if I'm not all that keen on resolving the situation in the best way. 

Today, I had a confrontation at the gym where I teach yoga. Once upon a time, I enjoyed getting into somebody's face when they annoyed me. But I've been operating on a different vibe and working pretty hard at changing my automatic responses to situations. So today, as this event was unfolding, I did my level best to stay calm, to project love, to see the argument from all sides, and to attempt to diffuse the anger being thrown at me. 

When all was said and done, it took me a really long time to bring my attention back to the present moment. The energy I was giving off was so affected that I couldn't get my music to work, I couldn't keep track of my yoga flow, I had my rights and lefts totally mixed up. But soon enough, I remembered to stop, take a few deep breaths, center myself on the thoughts that I breathe in love, breathe out peace, and I carried OM. 

I'm sure this whole incident will somehow turn into a yoga lesson, or two or three. Isn't everything a yoga lesson now? :)

I walked into a Hallmark store this afternoon and the first display I saw was a frame that had a "... days til I'm a grama" sign. The number was 108 - the number of beads on my mala. I immediately touched my wrist, breathed love and light into my body, smiled and continued shopping. 

The universe keeps giving me confirmation that I'm moving in the direction of my Dharma! 

What kind of lessons do you find yourself repeating?

Kony 2012 and Why I Want to Stay in Haiti

In the beginning, my dream was to go to Africa. I mean, doesn't everybody at some point or another have a vision of themselves in the Motherland doing something, whether it be missions work, humanitarian aid, or even just a safari? My initial interest was sparked after seeing the animated film, Hugo the Hippo. It turned me on to Zimbabwe and the political strife of the region. Later, as I started seriously thinking of what type of work I would do in Africa, I realized I wanted to work with children. I looked into several options. For a few years now I've been looking into positions with assorted NGOs and charities in Zimbabwe such as the Zimbabwe Project, a Canadian orphan care organization. But as I do not have a Master's degree in the areas they require, I had been unable to catch a break. I guess true experience and expertise in a field doesn't mean squat when you have shareholders to answer to. 

Two Little Words...

WORK ETHIC - I know, it doesn't seem like much to you. But in reality, it is nearly everything. A man is only as good as his words - these two in particular. This is a foreign concept for most people. I'm not sure what the world is coming to, but if the percentage of employable persons that are actually conscientious of the meaning of these words is any indication, we might well expect something epic like the great flood to be coming our way. 

I find it absolutely incredible the lengths and depths I have to go to to get even the littlest things out of the people I work with. It's worse than trying to feed squash to a toddler! 

God grant me the serenity 
to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Pray for me, folks!

Frustrations

Remember that commercial for Heinz Ketchup where they used the Anticipation song and you had to watch while the ketchup moved like molasses out of the bottle? That's what it's like getting nearly anything done in Haiti. I'm posting this here because this is my Rant and Rave page and I don't want to put it on the other. 

It seems like everything we try do do here is a matter of one step forward, 17 steps back. 

I have been waiting since October 11th for this man to get me my permanent resident documents. He has so far stood me up over 20 times, even refusing to take my calls for a period of two weeks. And when I try to confront him on it, he has absolutely no sense of wrong-doing. 

So here I sit and wait, he is over 2 hours past due. The days just keep passing and nothing happens and there's no way to compel anyone to do anything except for threats of bodily harm. 

Harumph!

Oh how I long for the days when I could just make someone do push-ups when they pissed me off! lol

Keep praying for me. I'm sure to evolve eventually!

Count your blessings

Yes, well, after all this time, you think I would get it. I've heard this so many times you would think it would be second nature. Yet after I've taken action to correct a wrong done to me I continue to brood over the fact of the initial wrong-doing instead of being satisfied with the ultimate outcome! What's the matter with me?


So tonight I had a conversation with my friend, the psychic. I don't pay for her services, well, just that once, but that was only for fun, mostly. I guess I'm one of those people that doesn't really want to know the future. But I don't play the lotto or read my horoscope of wish to be filthy rich and so on and so on...I digress...

So, we were talking, and as per usual she was asking me how to market her services. Now, I can't help you if you don't really want help. There's nothing more aggravating than someone asking you the same questions, over and over...yet when you say to them, "hey, I told you this last time. Didn't you try it?" and they say no, they didn't try it...what do you do with that?

So during our conversation, she pointed out the same thing she pointed out the last few times we've talked, always unsolicited, that I have this really great energy about me and the only thing preventing me from achieving my goals is my underlying attitude of having been cheated out of something. She called it my "woman scorned, but not just by love" attitude. And I always reply with, "If only you knew."

And I thought to myself, yeah, I've heard this before. And I said as much to her. So my question is this: If knowing you have a problem is half the solution, what the hell is the other half? How do you let that go? How do you release that and move on? Cuz I'll tell you, I've tried, and tried and tried.

As I was pondering this with her, I mentioned that I don't really hold any resentments toward anyone in particular, anymore. I've worked really hard this past year to forgive those who I have held the burden of resentment towards. And while we were having this conversation, I realized, it isn't someone else that I'm bitter with about any of the past grief in my life. It's me.

I realized I am mad at me! I've spent the better part of my adult life feeling duty bound to a bunch of people that never asked me to do that for them. That was my own doing! Nobody forced me to put myself last. There is no written law that says I had to put everyone else first and sacrifice my own satisfaction. As a matter of fact, the very people I felt honor-bound to please and take care of were mostly selfish people that never took my feelings into account in there decisions and actions. So why did I feel the need to do so? It's mostly me that I'm angry with! How could I have flittered away so many years?

Hmmmm, this is going to take some serious meditation and prayer.

How to forgive oneself.

Suggestions appreciated...

New Year, New Decade, New Outlook

So 2010 is looking an awful lot like 2009. And let's all agree that 2009 was just awful!

So what can be done about it?

I wake up every day and think to myself...self, this is the day we are going to be wowed by humanity and our faith will be restored! And sadly, every night I put my head on the pillow and pray, "Please God, let me say good bye to today and may tomorrow be better."

Don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't experience blessings every day. Some small, some subtle, some may go unnoticed and for that I am truly sorry.

But really, folks...How much yuck is one person supposed to take?

Well, at least now I am back in school. That should keep me busy enough to keep my mind off of the rest of the yuck.

Soon I will be moving out of my home...and I still haven't decided what to do about that. I have options, which is a blessing many folks don't have. And I am very appreciative of that, even if I don't always express that.

I suppose I need to get around to finishing up the packing. I've been cracking at it a little at a time. I suppose the procrastination is my way of avoiding the inevitable. I know it won't work, but hey, I'm human.

Well, it's late and I have an early morning meeting.

I leave with this prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father, please look after my children. Guide their actions and decisions along a path that will find them safe and protect them with Your Holy Spirit. Give them the strength to face the challenges of each new day. Help them to see Your ways. Protect my friends and family and co-workers. Give peace to those who are troubled. Heal those that are sick. And may we all delight in your will and walk in your ways. Amen

some much needed R & R

So I'm off of school for a few weeks and as of Wed will be off of work for a week and a half and next week my super awesome uncle is flying me to Vegas for New Years Eve. I am so looking forward to this. I feel like I have lost so much this year, I think I really really deserve some fun time.

Let's review:



I lost the job that told me who I was. I am in the process of losing my house. I lost my sister to Cancer, (but at least was able to reconcile with here first) but in the process, lost my family to petty BS. My 18 year old has decided he doesn't want to play by the rules anymore so I am losing him.

It's been a sucky ass year for me!

But here are the things I am thankful for (with caveats):

I got my sister back, if only for a brief moment in time (see above)
I got my bestest cousin back after 30 years (and I'm so glad to find out she's just as crazy/wonderful as me!)
I have my health (although this kick class is making me feel my age some days!)
I learned how to fall in love again (even if it was fleeting)
I have a wonderfully loving BFF who supports the hell out of me, even when I'm an asshole (even though she's a really bad influence on me and plies me with wine right before kick class!)
My BFFs children love the hell out of me, even when I tell them I have nothing for them for Xmas (and then I took them to see a movie instead, with pop and popcorn!)
I have wonderful friends who are more precious to me than any family member ever tried to be. (and I'm so glad they are all crazy/wonderful like me!)
I have two wonderfully fantastic friends who were friends of my mom's who have done more for me than they will ever know. (I feel like they have helped me get to know the woman that she was since I lost her before we got that far)
My crappy job has some fantastic perks (Pistons Suits, after hours events with drinking, hob-knobbing with impotant peeps)
The crazy Canadian Governor with the really big facial mole is paying for me to get an education so I can finally get the recognition for the skill levels I have. (even though I will never be able to find a good paying job once I get said degree!)
I was paid by DuPont long enough to have the money to buy a new car when my van finally crapped out on me. (I miss the van, but I love my little clown car!)
And last but definitely not least, I am loved by God. (though why I sometimes can't understand!)

So for now I'll cry in my wine and maybe spend a few days in bed, and then when I'm over that, I'll pack my bags and go to Vegas, where maybe I'll find a husband! Stranger things have happened!

Peace be to you during this crazy, frantic, mixed up time of the year that is supposed to be about the Savior and NOT about the savings!

Time to see a man about a house

No, it's not a typo...today is the day I go see the lawyers about trying to save my house from foreclosure. On the one hand, if I let the house go, I'll be able to stretch my minuscule income further and possibly sock a little away for the future. I'd be able to get a better car. I wouldn't have to worry about all the maintenance and upkeep of this place.

On the other hand, If I let it go, I let go all the privileges that come with home ownership...privileges like privacy, and sense of Independence.

I'm not asking for much. I don't want to be given any extra special dispensations. I just want to be able to come home at the end of my very long days and relax. I'd like to be able to walk into the kitchen and fix something to eat. I'd like to be able to draw a hot bath and soak in it, even to fall asleep in it! lol

So, here's my prayer:

God, whatever happens today, please guide me in seeing that you have a plan for me and comfort me in my time of need. Your will be done, easier spoken than accepted. Whatever your plan, help me to adjust to whatever may come. Give me the strength to do the things I must do. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

Amen!

We should do this more often

I'm not really sure what reconciliation feels or looks like, but I'd say I came pretty close today. Normally I don't attend the little kiddy parties in my family, but my cousin gave my son a very generous gift a couple weeks ago at his grad party. Feeling rather obligated, I went to her little girl's birthday party. I expected the usual, a few aunts and uncles, a few cousins, and a half dozen or so screaming little drama queens that leave me thanking God I don't have to do the little kiddy thing anymore! The surprise came when I walked out onto the patio to see my sister's daughter sitting in a chair, awkwardly smiling as she looked up at me.


You see, my sister and I have been estranged for about 8 years or so. Even before that, my sister had pulled back from our side of the family and didn't participate in family occasions. The few times I've seen my littlest nephew, Scott, age 6, were the night I snuck into the hospital upon his birth, knowing my brother-in-law wouldn't dare make a scene there, and at the few select funerals my sister has attended over the years, and although our family has had it's share of these I don't think I've seen my sister's children in at least 2 or 3 years!

So needless to say, the little one doesn't know me. Her oldest son, Kevin, age 16, now lives with his dad. Her daughter, Linda, age 13, and her middle son, Sam, age 11, remember me, but tend to be a little reserved around me. Sam wasn't allowed to attend the party due to being grounded for his report card. This type of discipline is just one of the many things his father and I don't see eye-to-eye on.

So, upon seeing my niece, I promptly walked over and stood her up and hugged her within an inch of her life. I whispered in her ear and told her that not one day had gone by that I had not loved her. I whispered that she may have to forgive me later, but I wasn't sure I'd be willing to let her go for quite some time. Once the tears slowed down, I reluctantly let her go and turned to see if any of her siblings were there. That's when I spotted the little one in the pool.

I marched over, still in my Sunday best, and shouted for him to come to the side of the pool. I said hello to him and asked him if he knew who I was. He looked at me with confusion in his eyes. I told him I was his auntie Michele and asked him if I could hug him. He kinda shrugged and scooted toward the edge of the pool. I scooped him up and proceeded to hug him within an inch of his life and gave him a volley of kisses and whispered in his ear, "I know you don't know who I am, but I have loved you every day of your life! You can go back to swimming now!" I set him back to rights as he gave me a weird look and went back to terrorizing the girls in the pool.

Shortly after, I changed into my swimsuit and also got into the pool to terrorize the girls. I swear I immediately turned into a 10 year old! I coaxed my niece into the pool and we had a great time swimming, doing somersaults, tossing kids about and having shoot-outs with all the water cannons. There was also a moon bounce which was slippery as all get out due to the pool soaked bouncers. We spent the afternoon going from the pool to the bouncy and back. It really was quite an experience, but anyone that knows me know how much I love to play with the kids and carry on like a fool!

Just before the cupcakes and ice cream where brought out, I noticed my auntie and grama heading around the side of the house. Then suddenly they where on their way back to the patio each on a side of my sister, helping her to traverse the landscape. You see, she's been receiving treatments for cervical cancer and from the news I've received, the chemo's been kicking her butt. But I've also seen her posting on FB and she seems to have a great attitude about her illness, which I understand helps with the healing process.

It's been a difficult year for me, this 2009. First I lost my job, then the bank decided against helping me keep my house, then my baby boy graduated from High School, then I found out my sister was diagnosed and I suddenly found myself dealing with all these emotions at once. I've done a lot of praying, and a lot of crying, and I decided I had to forgive her. Now, this doesn't mean I will soon be forgetting how she hurt me, or how much of my niece and nephews' lives I have missed out on, but I didn't want to carry around the resentment I had a single day longer.

I've been cleaning my house and taking stock of what I want to keep and what I should get rid of in anticipation of being foreclosed on. I figure, the less I have to pay to store while I shack up on some one's couch, the better. I decided that this would be the perfect time to additionally take stock of my emotional baggage and get rid of that as well! I've been looking around my world and asking myself if I really am good Christian or just going thru the motions. I'm working on being the "bigger man" but letting go of the need to let everyone know just WHY I'm the "bigger man". Several weeks ago, I posted a letter of forgiveness to my sister. Since then, I've been working on really meaning it.

I greeted my sister with a, "well, don't you look like hell?" to which she smiled genuinely and said thanks. My comment shocked a few of my cousins and they were obviously non-plussed about it, but I said to them that if I had said, "well, you look great!" she would have just assumed I was lying! My sister laughed and nodded and agreed and they seemed to take that at face value. I went back to playing with the kids. What a great way to spend a day. Although, did you know that bouncing in a moonwalk is like doing lunges? My thighs are KILLING ME as I sit here and type this. I'll have to remember to take a Motrin before bed tonight!

So as the party drew to an end and we all made our ways toward the front of the house to say our goodbyes, I grabbed up my nephew and hugged him and kissed him and told him to never forget how much I love him. As well with my niece, plus I asked them both to pass on my love to their brother Sam and tell him I love him too. Linda was not thrilled with the prospect of passing on a kiss to him, but agreed anyways.

Then I walked over to my sister and for the heck of it, threw my arms around her, expecting a gratuitous hug and nothing more. Instead, she grabbed on to me like it was a matter of life or death and proceeded to give me a hug that can only be compared to what I imagine an actual bear hug would feel like. Eight years seemed to melt away into the atmosphere in that hug. As we stood there, neck to neck, all the love I had for her came rushing out of the box I had been hiding it in and I couldn't keep the tears back. I sobbed and shook, and shivered as we allowed our grip to say all the things that we couldn't, and still we stood grasping one another. I whispered that I loved her and that I was praying for her that I was really happy to be hugging her to which she replied "we should do this more often"

Forgiveness

If you haven't yet read The Shack by William P. Young, you need to, and as soon as possible. It is one of the most moving stories I have read in my lifetime. I get emotional just thinking about the way Mr. Young lays out the relationship of the protagonist with the Father. Yes, it is a work of religious fiction, Christian in fact, but in a good way. Regardless of your spiritual proclivities, you will no doubt recognize the profound need mankind has for a relationship with others and especially with The Creator.

In brief, it is the story of a man who loses his youngest child, a daughter, to the whims of a murderous madman during a camping trip in the mountains of Eastern Oregon. Police follow his tracks to a cabin in the woods where her bloody dress is found. Her body is never discovered. Five years later, the father is awakened from his grief-stricken, sleep-walking state and bidden to the cabin in the woods at the behest of The Lord, God Almighty, going by the nickname of Papa. Following is an excerpt from the book:

"Mack, for you to forgive this man is for you to release him to me and allow me to redeem him."
"Redeem him?" Again Mack felt the fire of anger and hurt. "I don't want you to redeem him! I want you to hurt him, to punish him, to put him in hell..." His voice trailed off.
Papa waited patiently for the emotions to ease.
"I'm stuck, Papa. I just can't forget what he did, can I?" Mack implored.
"Forgiveness is not about forgetting, Mack. It is about letting go of another person's throat."
"But I thought you forget our sins?"
"Mack, I am God. I forget nothing. I know everything. So forgetting for me is the choice to limit myself. Son," Papa's voice got quiet and Mack looked up at him, directly into his deep brown eyes, "because of Jesus, there is now no law demanding that I bring your sins back to mind. They are gone when it comes to you and me, and they run no interference in our relationship."
"But this man..."
"But he too is my son. I want to redeem him."
"So what then I just forgive him and everything is okay, and we become buddies?" Mack stated softly but sarcastically.
"You don't have a relationship with this man, at least not yet. Forgiveness does not establish relationship. In Jesus, I have forgiven all humans for their sins against me, but only some choose relationship. Mackenzie, don't you see that forgiveness is an incredible power - a power you share with us, a power Jesus gives to all whom he indwells so that reconciliation can grow? When Jesus forgave those who nailed him to the cross they were no longer in his debt, nor mine. In my relationship with those men, I will never bring up what they did, or shame them, or embarrass them."
"I don't think I can do this," Mack answered softly.
"I want you to. Forgiveness is first for you, the forgiver," answered Papa, "to release you from something that will eat you alive; that will destroy your joy and your ability to love fully and openly. Do you think this man cares about the pain and torment you have gone through? If anything, he feeds on that knowledge. Don't you want to cut that off? And in doing so, you'll release him from a burden that he carries whether he knows it or not - acknowledges it or not. When you choose to forgive another, you love him well."

So okay, my hurt isn't quite that tragic, but it is mine. I have nurtured it for years. It has molded me, shaped me, deeply impacted all my other relationships. It is part of who I am. I have tried on repeated occasions to reconcile this broken relationship, tried to bridge the gap. And every time the street commission comes out and puts a "bridge out" sign up and that's all she wrote.

You have stolen 8 years of my niece and nephews' lives from me. You have caused my son to grow up with no real cousins, and you know how close he and Kevin where. It was not bad enough I was an orphan, you had to take away my only sister, even if we were never going to be bffs, you were all I had. You hurt me. Really, really hurt me. And then tried to ruin my relationships with the rest of my family. And for what?

I learned a long time ago to compartmentalize the pain so that I could at least function. I learned to hide the softest parts of me. I used to keep a little back, but after that, I learned to keep a LOT back. Something broke in me, something I fear will never be repaired.

I have tried to be a good friend to those around me. I have been blessed with a fantastic group of friends that have served as surrogate family, surrogate sisters. They are wholly undeserved, as I have never be able to give to them as much as they give to me. And until I forgive you, wholly and completely, I never will.

And then came the cancer. You had to go and get the same damn disease that killed our dear, sweet mother. I cry foul! That's not fair. Now I'm expected to be the bigger man. I'm the older sister so I'm just supposed to "do the right thing" and I'm not ready to. I've become very familiar with my pain. It's like a pair of old slippers, not entirely comfortable, but reliable. Plus, I'm tired of being the one that has to go first. I'm tired of trying to make things right and having you slam another rejection in my face.

But you trumped my selfish need to hold on to my ugly. So, my sister, I forgive you. I release you from all wrongs perpetrated against me, whether real or imagined. I wipe the slate clean, for real this time. Tabula Rasa.

Ball's in your court.

Dear Heavenly Father, Please come into my heart and wash away the burden of grief and hurt I feel toward my sister and renew a right spirit within me. Amen

Sunday Scripture

Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Cor 12:8-10)

“If God loves everyone, why are there different religions?”

I read this on Tom Foreman's blog of letters to President Obama. The question came from his daughter after she was excluded from a group of kids at school because of her religion. This was his answer. I think it is beautiful in it's simplicity. It captures how so many of us feel:

“I think there are different religions,” I told her, “because adults, like children, disagree on things, and sometimes we focus more on those disagreements than on what we have in common. Imagine there was a girl named Katherine. She has a friend at school who calls her that. At dance class, another friend calls her Kathy. And at soccer, a third friend calls her Kate. One day all three of these friends meet, but they do not know they are acquainted with the same girl. One says, ‘My friend Katherine is the nicest girl ever.’ Another says, ‘You are wrong. My friend Kathy is better.’ And the third says, ‘Nonsense, my friend Kate is better than either of your friends.’ I think that is how it is with God. I think we are all praying to the same being, but we use different names and forget that God is big enough to love us all.”

from: http://ac360.blogs.cnn.com/2009/04/12/dear-president-obama-83-ten-things-what-if-god/#more-34300

Dear God, Please help the world to see You for the loving God that You are and to embrace one another as brothers and sisters in that love. Amen.

Spinning Wheel

SPINNING WHEEL
D. Clayton / Thomas)
Blood, Sweat, & Tears - 1969

What goes up must come down
Spinning wheel got to go 'round
Talking 'bout your troubles it's a crying sin
Ride a painted pony let the Spinning wheel spin

You got no money and you got no home
Spinning wheel all alone
Talking 'bout your troubles and you never learn
Ride a painted pony let the Spinning wheel turn

Did you find the directing sign on the
Straight and narrow highway
Would you mind a reflecting sign
Just let it shine within your mind
And show you the colours that are real

Someone is waiting just for you
Spinning wheel, Spinning true
Drop all your troubles by the riverside
(1: Catch a painted pony on the spinning wheel ride)
(2: Ride a painted pony let the spinning wheel fly)

Okay, so you wanna know what that has to do with me?

I currently aspire to be spinning my wheels. I'd give anything to at least have that much momentum. Spinning wheels would indicate the engaging of gears of some kind, something I currently can't find the motivation to achieve. I feel like I'm stuck in neutral, just waiting for some source of energy to start me in any direction.

Oh, occasionally some force makes contact with me and I go careening off to complete some task, grocery shopping, a birthday party, a committee meeting. But when the source of motion is long gone, I come to rest again.

Once in awhile I even get to feel the joy of being pushed over the top of a hill. These moments are actually exhilarating. I soon pick up speed, maybe fix my hair, put on some make-up. I really engage with my surroundings. But once again, after the momentum is gone, I come to rest and cannot seem to initiate motion again on my own.

To put it succinctly, this really sucks! I am in such a funk and I can't seem to rescue myself. I pray, I promise, I even try to bribe myself. I make plans, set goals, create to-do lists. But without an outside source of forward momentum, I lay motionless. It's really becoming pitiful.

I thought once the weather improved I would snap out of it, but that hasn't happened yet. I had hoped to get in the motor home and go visiting for a while, but with the transmission leaking, I don't dare take a chance, and my mechanic has been incommunicado for almost a week now so no sign of when that will be repaired.

I have my appointment at the Michigan Works office next week. Maybe that will bring the resolution I have been waiting for to get me out of this blah blah land that I am living in. Hopefully they will have good news for me.

Dear God, It's me, Michele. Please help me to contribute to society in a positive way. Please help me to feel valued. Please comfort me in my times of darkness and despair. I know that you have plans for me. Please help me to be patient in learning what those plans are and give me the courage to go in the direction you are leading me.
Amen

F*** My Life

Today, I was turned down for the China job because I selfishly chose to raise my child with no support from his father or the government and worked my behind off financing really expensive christian education for said child instead of spending the money on finishing my education. My child is graduating this May with a 1.5 GPA. Since I lost my job, I won't be able to pay for his college either. FML

40 days, Mar 5 and 6

For Thursday:

Today I am grateful to my Green Task Force members. These folks may get torqued up about the environment and everyone else thinks they are crazy, but without enthusiastic, passionate people like them and others or their kind, the greed mongers would have used up this planet a few decades ago and we'd all be Crackers!

Thanks for your unyielding passionate dedication to keeping it green!

I love you, fellow tree huggers!

For Friday:

Today I am grateful for cable guys that let my dog and cat climb all over them. It's nice to see men being so compassionate to animals. My animals are usually pretty good judges of character, and you, Carlos, are A-OK in my book!

40 Days of Gratitude - Wed, Mar 4

Today I am grateful for my friend Nancy. She is my favorite gym pal. No matter how I feel when I enter the gym, one smile or one word from Nancy and everything is right with the world. Nancy believes in me to such a degree that I'm sure if I called her from jail and said I was caught robbing a bank, she would be convinced I had a good reason behind it! Nancy emigrated from Iraq in the 80s and she has taught me more about what it means to be a citizen of this country than any history or civics class ever could. Thank You, God, for putting my path in line with Nancy's.

40 Days - Tues March 3

Today I am grateful to the little nutter at Panera that ordered the wrong thing for his girlfriend (got Hot Chocolate/was supposed to be Iced Hot Chocolate - how is that possible?) and donated the error to me! Yeah! Thank you, God for kind-hearted, generous people. They help restore my faith in Humanity!

40 Days of Gratitude Part II

I owe you three days. Here are my picks:

Andrew Lobsinger, Andrew Lloyd Webber, the inventor of the iPod.

Here's why:


Andrew Lobsinger - for providing endless hours of entertainment. There was a time when you wouldn't come anywhere near me. Now you feel comfortable enough to "show off your talents". Thank you for being such a lovely little man!

Andrew Lloyd Webber - for providing endless hours of entertainment. Your plays have inspired me, comforted me, humored me. They're like old friends that blow into town occasionally and sweep me off my feet

the inventor of the iPod - for providing endless hours of entertainment. My iPod allows me relative obscurity when I'm in the hot room at the gym. It allows me to check out for a while and just really relax and reconnect.

See you soon!

40 Days Of Gratitude

Stole this from my bff ( http://thinkingdiva.blogspot.com/ )

"Welcome to 40 Days of Gratitude.

Here's how it works: pick a person in your life (at home, at work, in the family, God counts too) to thank for something [anything] once a day for the 40 Days of Lent. Be unrelenting in gratitude. Think to thank. Set a low bar so you can clear it everyday. You don't have to bring the person you thank to tears of joy. Just a simple thanks for the simple things. At least once a day, every day, catch 'em doing something that a thankful person would be thankful for and pretend you're that person!

Of course, you're free to do it some other way if you like (I'm blogging it). But do something. Lent is the time frame that it takes most of us to form a new habit--roughly six weeks. Wouldn't it be great to have the new habit of daily gratitude? After Easter, you'll be a more thankful person."

okay, so because I'm a few days behind, today I am giving thanks to the following:

My BFF, my good friend Tim, and Jade, the pool room attendant at my gym. Here's why:


My BFF - for too many reasons to list. Mostly for swooping in when I most need it and keeping me from going face down in my chicken soup. - you rock!

Tim - for holding my hand through the last (2 months for me, 6 months for you) few months as we watched them rip the band-aid off so slowly. Some days you were the only thing keeping me together

Jade - even though your job sucks buckets! you are mostly in a good mood and always up for some good conversation. I'd probably still come to the gym if you weren't there, but you make the experience that much less painful.

Okay, so, see you next time!

Michele去中国!

translates: Michele is going to China! No, I haven't heard anything yet. But a good friend told me today to "name it and claim it!" so I am!!!

I'm sooooo psyched!