Misrepresentation

This trailer is almost 9 minutes long but worth the time. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=8__GFHYkdZo

Time Flies When You're Having Fun!

It seems like it has been ages since I've had an opportunity to write for fun. I have finally finished school - finished with a 4.0 and most distinguished graduate honors - even got to give the commencement speech. It was an exciting night. My grandma was there along with my children and closest friends. I was interviewed for the local paper, too! My 15 minutes of fame were the highlight of my college career!

Now on to the next adventure - I'm working on going to Haiti for a year. I had lunch with a local icon who is exec director of a charity organization that runs an orphanage in Haiti. I am flying down next weekend to check it out and if all goes well I will be moving there next month.

It is going to be a crazy month between now and then. My son moved home last week and I will be busy packing away my belongings and transferring over many of accounts to keep things going back here while I'm gone. I plan to set up a program so friends and family can donate money or supplies for the orphanage so that the compensation I ask for will be covered so stay tuned for information.

I am so excited!

A Few of My Favorite Rants

I'm tired of Comcast boasting record breaking speeds, yet my streaming video gets disrupted a bazillion times.

I'm tired of my kid telling me he didn't mess anything up, yet after he stayed at my townhouse for a sum total of 14 hours my wireless router no longer recognizes my Internet connection.

I'm tired of my laptop screen going black for no reason.

I'm tired of people who feel the need to espouse useless information that isn't even accurate, when nobody asked them in the first place.

I'm tired of everyone having an opinion on everything! Sometimes people say stuff just because they want to get it off their chest. Or maybe they are hoping to find a sympathetic ear. They sure as hell didn't offer up their gripe so you can consistently tell them why they are an ASSHOLE!

So, three glasses of wine have apparently had no effect on my temperament tonight and I have to be up early in the morning.

Goodnight cruel world. You get this one. Let's see who emerges victorious tomorrow!

Conversations with myself

Well, there are a few things I'd like to say to a few people that just wouldn't be prudent at this time. So, I'm going to say them to myself.

Here goes:


*You really piss me off when you walk around here like little miss oh I'm so special and you're sweet to everyone but me. Get over it. I hurt your feelings. I said I'm sorry. Pull up your big girl panties and get on with life.

*I really can't figure out where I went wrong. How did you spend all that time with me and still end up thinking and acting the way you do?

*I really miss you and I don't think you put me high enough on your priority list. I feel like I should be more important to you.

*I don't understand why you continue to shut me out. I am the closest living relative they have on earth besides you. It hurts me to the point of crippling me that you won't let me be a part of their lives.

*So I took advantage of you. I was wrong to do that. But just for a moment I wanted to pretend that you hadn't done the same thing to me all those years ago.

*acknowledge me, dammit!

*I no longer have the desire to have a relationship with you. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me...I won't be fooled a third time.

*if I was any lonelier, I'd be a big-haired 80s rock ballad.

I <3 Sex Education

I was driving home today when I happened upon a couple of guys walking toward me from the other side of the road. I could tell one of them had some kind of something bundled in the crook of his left arm. As I pulled up to the stop light, he noticed me looking and immediately changed his posture and adjusted the bundle. I could see then that he was carrying a baby simulator, one of the most inventive, yet statistically non-productive, teaching tools of the 20th century.

He must have thought I was someone he knew because right away, he corrected his hand positions and began to cradle the baby's head with one hand, while supporting the baby's bottom with his other. I smiled and giggled and when he realized he didn't know me at all, he blushed and relaxed his hold on the little joy. His buddy punched him in the arm and I could hear them berating each other with terms of endearment known to parents of teenage boys nation wide!

Oh, the websites spout research and statistics touting their substantive evidence that real life experience is proven to be effective in teaching kids about the reality of raising children. But when you think about it, in my generation we only had the menstruation video and we didn't have pregnancy pacts back then!

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/story?id=5215182&page=1

While I don't advocate abstinence only policies, I do think it is important for children to be made aware of the consequences of their actions. I think the best thing we can do as parents is to raise our children to have the self confidence and self value to know they will make good decisions.

In the mean time, I think the humiliation these boys endures, while ineffective, sure is entertaining!

“If God loves everyone, why are there different religions?”

I read this on Tom Foreman's blog of letters to President Obama. The question came from his daughter after she was excluded from a group of kids at school because of her religion. This was his answer. I think it is beautiful in it's simplicity. It captures how so many of us feel:

“I think there are different religions,” I told her, “because adults, like children, disagree on things, and sometimes we focus more on those disagreements than on what we have in common. Imagine there was a girl named Katherine. She has a friend at school who calls her that. At dance class, another friend calls her Kathy. And at soccer, a third friend calls her Kate. One day all three of these friends meet, but they do not know they are acquainted with the same girl. One says, ‘My friend Katherine is the nicest girl ever.’ Another says, ‘You are wrong. My friend Kathy is better.’ And the third says, ‘Nonsense, my friend Kate is better than either of your friends.’ I think that is how it is with God. I think we are all praying to the same being, but we use different names and forget that God is big enough to love us all.”

from: http://ac360.blogs.cnn.com/2009/04/12/dear-president-obama-83-ten-things-what-if-god/#more-34300

Dear God, Please help the world to see You for the loving God that You are and to embrace one another as brothers and sisters in that love. Amen.

The Virginity Lie

“The lie of virginity — the idea that such a thing even exists — is ensuring that young women’s perception of themselves is inextricable from their bodies, and that their ability to be moral actors is absolutely dependent on their sexuality. It’s time to teach our daughters that their ability to be good people depends on their being good people, not on whether or not they’re sexually active. “

…

“Whether it’s delivered through a virginity pledge or by a barely dressed tween pop singer writhing across the television screen, the message is the same: A woman’s worth lies in her ability — or her refusal — to be sexual. And we’re teaching American girls that, one way or another, their bodies and their sexuality are what make them valuable. The sexual double standard is alive and well, and it’s irrevocably damaging young women. “

Reposted from http://thoseareturkeys.tumblr.com/

Welfare Reform?

Read this:

http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2009/01/brave-new-welfare

The article is a bit long, but it reveals the ugly other side of the welfare story. I know most people get their feathers up about the whole welfare issue, but after reading this, I'm hoping you may at least see the human side of why these programs exist and understand that when you say nobody in their right mind would want to live like that, you are correct. Most of these people are NOT in their right minds. What we really need is Mental Health reforms. We need to rid the world of the dark taboos attached to mental illness and recognize the assistance that is needed to get these people to a place in their lives where they can function.

I just watched an episode of Cold Case where the victim was a young mom on welfare. She and her daughter had been thrown from a 3rd story window. The little girl died and the mom was in a coma for 2 years. When she awakes, the detectives are finally able to investigate the incident.

Sadly, it turned out the mom was responsible for the accident. She threw herself and her daughter out the window to escape the social worker her threatened to take the child away from the mother because the mother caught him making advances on the little girl.

I was so enraged watching this drama unfold.

Please say a prayer for all of those unfortunate souls whom are lost to the system. May God watch over the children and protect them from the predators that seek to do them harm. Amen.

F*** My Life

Today, I was turned down for the China job because I selfishly chose to raise my child with no support from his father or the government and worked my behind off financing really expensive christian education for said child instead of spending the money on finishing my education. My child is graduating this May with a 1.5 GPA. Since I lost my job, I won't be able to pay for his college either. FML

More on why being 17 sucks

If only there were a bank where you could open up an account for your children and bank some of the lessons you learn from your mistakes. Then you could give your teenager an ATM card of sorts so that they could make withdrawals and there by avoid the traumas and still get the value of the lessons...

Or maybe you could buy bonds of some sort that they could "cash in" when they get in trouble.

Just say no to neck suckers, babe...

Absent Fathers

I am getting so sick of all the talk and debate and studies about how kids are more likely to grow up to be successful if they are being raised in home where the father is present vs being raised by a single mom.

At no time in these discussions/debates/studies do they address a. the quality of the parenting or 2. the desire of the child to succeed.

These are two VERY important factors in formulating a child's chance for success in life.

I don't think a child is going to benefit in a home where the father is a drunk, or a workaholic, or a cold, withholding bastard! And the same stands for single moms.

This morning on NPR they went on and on ad nauseum about how Barrack (famously) dreamt of his father. Okay, can we just say for the record, Barrack is THE perfect example of just how frikken successful a child can be when raised without a father in the home? And he's mixed race! We can crush two stigmas with one White House!

Puuuuleeeease! There are more than a few people out there that I am more than certain have benefited from not knowing their fathers!

I by no means set out to be a single mom. I'm sure there were times when my son could have benefited from having a man around. But that wasn't going to be just any man. As it happens, I never found a suitable partner. For what it's worth, most of the men in my young life weren't worth the testosterone they were full of, among other things!

It's quality over quantity when it comes to the ideal # of parents required to raise a child properly. And I will still come right back and point out to you all of the highly dysfunctional adults I know who grew up in "ideal" homes with a present, participating father and (oh, shock!) a stay at home mom...this is not the "winning formula" most people ascribe to. I think our world has changed, and with it the family unit. I think rather that lamenting about how we've gone wrong, lets embrace the "it takes a village" precept and start looking around our community for opportunities to help make every child's circumstances better.

Be a mentor, a foster parent, a foster-grand parent, or a friend. If you know a single mom, see if there is any thing you can do to help her give her children the most rounded childhood possible. Volunteer you help kids with homework, or coach a little league team. Children who have strong role models and adults they can turn to when they need advice are more likely to grow up to be successful.

Don't sit and judge just because someone constructed their family "out of order". Get with the times, there is no order!

Why being 17 sucks

1. you know EVERYTHING and nobody recognizes your superior knowledge

2. you're parents disrespect you and your friends with everything they say and everything they do and everything they don't say and everything they don't do, and then get pissed when you dish it back at them

3. your divine birthright to your parents every possession is not properly recognized by said parents

4. although you have the antithesis of an "ATTITUDE" you are continually accused of such and then your parents have the audacity to ground you until you get rid of same unpossessed "ATTITUDE"

5. you are perfectly capable of making life-altering decisions yet your parents insist on giving you a curfew!

Oh, how I wax nostalgic for those days of my youth! (NOT!)

Drunken Pedicures

Okay, so, admittedly, it is probably not a good idea to give yourself a pedicure after 2 20 oz lemon drop martinis, but I've had a very haried weekend of parenting, and damn it, I deserve to have pretty feet!

So, I'm probably going to regret drunk posting tomorrow, but I'm so full of witty repartee and I have no one to dazzle with it! so you are getting 100% unadulterated Rager Raging tonight! Hope you deserve it!
Gah! I read a plaque somewhere that said raising teenagers is like trying to nail jello to a tree. I think the author was WAY too ambitious! Gah!

So, Wednesday we went to the school to adjust my beautiful, intelligent, well rounded son's schedule for his Sr. year in high school. He decided it would be a fabulous idea to skip a year of math since he already had the required 3 credits of math. This was our first of many arguments. Because he had Algebra II last year, his only choices were Pre-Calc or statistics. As statistics is not a college prep class, that one is not even on the table. The principle won't even consider it. And he's not even going to dignify Nik's idea of NOT taking a math class this year. Out of the question.

Next topic, he's taking Nik out of Honor's English (which was supposed to be AP English, but not enough kid's had the required GPA so they lowered it to Honor's) even though the previous principle allowed the acceptance of his application into the program. His reason: Nik FAILED 11th grade English. Not only that, but brace yourself...he failed summer school English. Why? because he never bothered to turn in his final Research Paper. The one that he never told his mother he was assigned! Gah!!!

So, once the principle realizes that this is the first I'm hearing of this assignment, he apologizes, and he and Nik discuss whether or not he should be allowed to make it up. The principle gives in, and tells Nik he has 24 hours to complete this 4 page paper and get it turned in so he can have a passing grade for the summer school class that cost me $350 on top of the $6500 tuition I had already paid for him to fail two of his classed for the year.

Then, because of scheduling conflicts, and because my child lives a charmed life, he's going to have to allow him to take Honor's English, on top of Honor's Chem II and Pre-Calc...buh-bye social life for his Senior year...cuz now I'm going to have to baby sit him every step of the way...

I'm going to glaze over the details of the emotional break down both of us suffered at this point. Some very close friends and family members know the details. For the rest of my viewing public, suffice it to say that I now understand why some animals eat their young. Nik suffered what I can only assume was a brief mental breakdown, caused himself some minor physical harm and tried to play it off as my fault. Typical. But I have NO FRIGGEN IDEA where to go from here. Do I check him in somewhere and put him even further behind this year, or do I try to get him past this and hope he learns to get thru the hard shit. (pardon my language, but some instances just call for the hard stuff!)

I opt for the latter. I strip him of all individualism, take away all his electronic devices, and set him to task getting all of his assignment done. (oh, I forgot to mention, he had 3 books on his required reading list for AP - now Honor's - English class that needed to be journaled, that he deceived me into believing he had done in Summer School English - lies! all lies!)

So, fast forward to Sunday night...he still has ZERO written and has just discovered that he no longer has the instructions for writing the journals and none of his friends are in answering their cell phones - holiday weekend and all. I've been slaving away doing ALL of his chores for the last 4 days to make sure he didn't have any external stresses so he would be able to focus 100% on these assignments...I come in at 8:30 pm, tired, hungry, filthy and exhausted and he wants to know what's for dinner?

I lost my mind! I blew! I let him have it! I screamed! I called him names! I threatened him with bodily harm!

I won't go into all the details, but 3 hours later and 2 very large, very generous lemon drop martinis later, he's finished writing what he needed and I've just completed my first drunk pedicure...which, by the way, I'm terrified to see what it will look like tomorrow! Friends should never let friends give themselves drunk pedicures!

Maybe I'll post pictures...lol

Gah! I'd better get a HOUSEful of grand children or I'm gonna be one pissed off old lady!